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>was having the best sex dream… I can’t remember the specifics or who it was with but I remember being disappointed when I was woken up by a not entirely unpleasant sensation between my legs
>but only for a moment…
>at some point during the night button and I started spooning
>must have poked her awake not long ago too because she has her hands between her legs, playing with my disco stick…
>slowly pulling the skin back and forth while resting the tip between her legs
>”I was enjoying that dream you know…” I say sleepily, informing button of her crime
>”I can tell…” she says as she tugs at me ”just out of curiosity though, how many dicks were you working on at the same time?” button replies
>I ignore button’s first off-handed ‘you’re a faggot’ comment of the day and ponder whether or not she wakes up early to think about how she will call me a faggot in advance…
>or if it just comes out naturally…
>button removes her hand and pushes her bum into me so that my knob is sitting between her thighs
>”I feel like you are trying to tell me something?” I say to her in an attempt to delay the inevitable while my brain continues to undergo its bootup sequence
>right hemisphere… online
>button ignores me and begins to grind her ass back and forth
>wit system online
>”I just can’t quite put my tip on what it is you want…”
>I’m expecting button to call me out on my shitty pun with another elaborate joke like ‘you’re such a faggot that when you go to donate sperm all you have to do is fart in a cup’ or something along those lines
>but recently I have learnt something rather interesting about button you see
>when button is in the mood… she is really in the fucking mood and I can get away with more than I usually would
>though I decide that if I push my luck any further I’m probably going to get an elbow in the ribs
>I move my hands towards the ‘land down under’
>pretty bad reference in hindsight… because it’s anything but dry and arid…
>as I run my finger between button’s soft lips, she arches her back and pokes her butt out for me
>the thing about morning sexytimes is that, while it’s always fantastic… it’s fantastic for an entirely different reason to normal sexytimes
>most of the time it is the laziest and most uninventive sex you will ever have, precisely because it IS the morning and you have both just woken up
>also, morning breath and morning genitals means there are no expectations orally!
>that’s exactly what makes it so good, it’s slow and half arsed, but it’s comfortable and there are very few expectations or standards
>however just in case you ever find yourself faced with the unpleasant task of having to devour a morning (or anytime really) muff sandwich and your first tongue test reveals flavour akin to ‘11 day old cheese toasty that you lost down the side of your car seat’ with delicate notes of ‘alkaline battery acid’ then I’ll share my tip with you
>focus up on the clit first while kicking your saliva glands into overdrive
>and I’m talking some serious dribbling … start pushing that mouth snot out as if you were a 90yr old horny coot that just survived his 12th stroke, hasn’t had a solid meal in over a week and is mid-way through his morning sponge bath with that petite young spanish intern
>let it all run down into your lady’s cum receptacle until the thing is so diluted that you have to wear a snorkel to continue
>don’t ask me how I figured that out, just make sure if you find anything even remotely chunky with your tongue that you abort immediately
>I wriggle down lower in the bed so that I have a better angle at trying to dock with the button command module, trying to expend as little energy in the process as possible
>going to be long day, need to conserve fuel
>once things are aligned appropriately, I begin preparations for the docking process by using some of button’s juice to get myself nice and slippery
>”Houston, we are cleared to dock”
>I enter into her slowly, working myself in and out, slightly deeper each time
>she winces a little at first but very quickly starts to settle into things, her breathing getting louder and louder
>fortunately button is as wet as a levy in a monsoon and before long I am as far inside of her as the position will allow
>I begin working myself in and out of her lazily while gripping onto her hips to help minimize effort
>spooning is really just sideways doggystyle huh, I think to myself while enjoying the contrasting feeling between button’s fresh dry morning skin and the warm wet feeling of drowning my pink leather ferret inside of her
>now that things are oiled up and working appropriately, I raise myself slightly back up the bed so that I enter button at a steeper angle, massaging her stomach from the inside so to speak…
>it almost immediatly has the desired effect
>her breathing goes from soft “mmmpphhh’s”, to lazy morning moaning
>button reaches back and runs her hand through my hair
>haven’t even lifted my head off the pillow… to early… can’t be fucked
>I enjoy the slow pace along with lack of needed effort and after about 15 minutes, button manages to climax several times
>I roll her over on her stomach, and push my beef whistle back into her taco
>from past experience, this position allows for the deepest penetration short of having your girl wrap her legs behind her head
>in my experience that is… I’ve never dated a gymnast unfortunately
>because of the angle this also allows for really good ‘g-spot drumming’
>I slowly start to push as deep as I can and before long I can feel my knob hitting on her cervix
>”OW… fuck anon… careful” button winces as I ‘try’ to plant myself as deep as I can… more for the novelty than anything else at this point
>”wuss” I tease at her, it’s not often that she ‘can’t handle’ whatever it is I give to her
>feels pretty good being able to bottom out in her
>I hold myself up over the top of button, which is more effort than I care for at this hour but I’m quickly starting to get more and more into the mood
>it doesn’t take long before button is having an intimate affair with the pillow, moaning passionately at it
>”mmmmmpphhhhhh…. go harder!”
>”but I thought you said to be careful” I jest back at her surprisingly honest request…
>”changed my mind, stop being a faggot”
>fine, I think as I quicken the pace and force of each thrust into her
>”hhnnnggghh… I meant…. Nnnngggh… harder AND deeepphhnnngggg…”
>Jesus didn’t take her long to get use to this, I think to myself as I start to bottom out in her again
>I can feel my knob hitting her cervix with each deep thrust… which actually feels a bit distracting
>also something about cervix cancer I think… maybe that’s a wives’ tale though
>”agghhhh… not that fucking deep” button growls from beneath me
>wellwhatthefuckyouwantthen?
>after fine tuning things for a bit I finally find a depth that seems agreeable with her
>and by agreeable, I mean it sounds like she is trying to fus-roh-dah a hole through the pillow
>I don’t even need to try and pace myself at this point, so much concentration on getting the angle right, the depth right, holding myself up… I’m not really making much progress
>I will consider this my morning gym session
>”fuuuggghhh… youregunnamakemecumagain” she whimpers into the pillow
>upon hearing her say this, something more primal stirs within my cerebral cortex
>I grab a hold of her hair and pull her head back, enjoying the brief window of dominance and control that I have over her until the day gets started for real and I turn back into her pet
>”deeeeper” button says during an exhale of breath
>I stop worrying about trying to throttle the depth and just start to thrust more naturally as I feel my consciousness switching from upper brain to lower brain
>this leads me to settle into a rhythm that better suits me, thrusting into button’s tight wet little hole with long deep movements
>slightly slower pace but each stroke in and out is unrestrained and uncontrolled
>I’m sitting at about 85m towards the finish line
>apparently button doesn’t mind my preference of pace that bad anyway…
>”huuhhhhhh fuuuuccckkk….” button suddenly moans out as she cums hard
>I feel her pussy tighten around my shaft
>HOLYSHITTHEFINISHLINE!!!
>the combination of her moaning, her body tensing beneath me and her love muscles squeezing around my cock, sends me over the edge
>I push myself as deep as I possibly can blasting salty tadpoles deep into her as she cums underneath me
>”…nnnngghh” I can’t help but sigh loudly as I lean down and rest my forehead on the back of buttons neck
>”ohhhh fuuuckkkhhh” button says, almost in a sort of crying
>I’m not sure how to describe it, but I swear to god there is a little extra pocket of vagina just past a girls cervix, like some sort of bonus level accessible to only those with the right key
>either way, that’s exactly where I deposited most of my load
>I left the rest on her back… because fuck you button
<WARNING: EXPLICT IMAGE – CLICK TO VIEW>
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>she didn’t seem to mind me that deep either, just needed some warming up
>I drop my weight onto her and roll off to the side, closing my eyes as I relax
>we both lay there for a bit, enjoying the cum-down
>I feel button shift and roll onto her side
>when I open my eyes, she is facing me
>staring back at me with that same bloody neutral look, breathing through her teeth
>”good morning…” I say to her
>no response…
>”uh oh…” she says eventually, but still without expression
>I raise an eyebrow and give her a curious look, she didn’t say it without enough conviction to sound particularly life threatening
>”we are going to need to wash the sheets today…” she continues
>I let out a sigh and roll my eyes
>button smiles at me, “I can feel something running down my leg…”
>”my bad I guess… shower time?”
>”not yet…” she says calmly “…it’s kinda cool…”
>button gives me a childish grin
>to be fair that is pretty much the exact same reaction I had when I was about 10, playing with my half grown willy under a warm lamp one day and ejaculated for the first time
>I then proceeded to inspect my freshly brewed baby syrup under the same lamp, searching for signs of wriggling life
>I was a curious child…
>button lays there with an amused smile on her face as she lets my cum drip down out of her and onto the bed
>like too much mayonnaise on a very tidy roast beef sandwich
>”these are Egyptian cotton sheets” I tell her, not really meaning it, they are cheap Egyptian cotton… at least it said they were on the plastic wrapping
>”huh, they’re what?” button responds
>”Egyptian cotton…”
>”pardon?”
>”egyp….” I break off halfway through the word and give her a blank look… realising that she is fucking with me
>button smiles at me, “faggot” she says as she gets up off the bed
>fuck you button… too early for this shit
>she pauses and turns around, poking her bum out at me revealing a long streak of jizz across one of her butt cheeks and more starting to drip out and down her thigh now that she is standing upright
>it was such a beautiful sight… watching 100’s of millions of my little spermbros drip out of button’s seaman locker
>she looks over her shoulder and studies the expression on my face
>I would like to think I was saluting proudly as my potential children fell to their inevitable death…
>but I was probably just staring at the sight with a stupid grin
>button, once more satisfied with her accomplishments, turns and heads to the shower
>she’s not stupid… she’s been on here enough to know about all the weird things that we like and I figure that was her way of treating me to a .webm worthy visual experience
>I think? I don’t know… I can never tell with button sometimes
>follow her into the shower to find her already washing the semen out of her slit under the hot water
>I step up into the tub and move to kiss her neck as the water runs over her chest
>button relaxes and leans back into me, closing her eyes and resting her head against me while enjoying the hot water blasting her modest but firm and perky assets
>”what do you want to do today” I ask her, playing with RB and LB
>”we are going shopping remember?”
>this confuses me at first, but I quickly realise what she is referring to
>spaghetti starts coming out of the shower head
disgunnabegoodday.rar
>I pick up the shampoo and start working it into button’s hair, least I can do to repay her for the cumshot pose she gave me
>engage faggot hairdressing mode
>at some point during the conditioning phase, I get side tracked playing with buttons hair, she doesn’t seem to mind though
>I separate it into pig tails to see what ‘button with handle bars’ would look like
sluttycheerleader.png
gt;I lift it all up into a bundle to see what she might look like with her hair up
>I decide she would look surprisingly pretty, cute even, compared to her usual ‘natural hair down’ look which I would describe more as beautiful or gorgeous
>”you would look cute with your hair up” I offer at her before my brain has a chance to apply its ‘this will get you called a faggot’ filter
>”you’re thinking about little boys again aren’t you”
>damn… I walked right into that one
>”I guess that explains what you were dreaming about” she continues
>my mental proofreading is as bad as my actual proofreading…
>sorry EditorBro and EditorAnons
>”oh no… wait” button says suddenly, turning around to face me with a dire look
>oh shit… don’t tell me she forgot the pill or something… one button is enough, I don’t need baby button as well
>button puts her hands on either side of my face gently, wearing a look of genuine concern as she looks into my eyes
>please don’t be pill!
>”please be honest with me…” she begins
>that’s never a good sign…
>/b/rothers… when a girl starts a sentence with “be honest with me” you have either dun goofed and she knows about it… or there simply isn’t going to be a right answer at all
>my advice would be to either fake a seizure, or start making Chewbacca noises while doing the crabwalk until she promptly exits the room
>mind racing now… is she going to ask me if I would care if she got pregnant? Would I care if she got pregnant? What would I name the baby? …button Jnr? Mini button? This would make a good episode of ‘friends’…
>”in your dream anon…” button begins, “…were you doing the fucking? Or were you the one being fucked?” she asks me as if the future of our friendship depends upon the answer
>I give her the driest, most blunt look I can possibly muster…
>button starts laughing at me and turns back around to face the shower stream once more
>”fuck you…” I say flatly
>”done that, what did you think I was going to say?” she says, still chuckling smugly at the worried look I must have had adorning my face
>”I dunno…” I mumble, feeling like a complete fucking tool at how easily she strings me along sometimes, “thought it was going to be something about forgetting to take the pill”
>”FUCK!!!”, button exclaims as she spins back around to face me the moment I finish the sentence
>”you’re kidding me…” I say in a frustrated tone
>I’ve been through this shit before with grills… I’m not interested in doing the whole ‘freaky deaky I didn’t leaky’ thing when they over think things so much they actually manage to cause their period to come late through shear stress and will power
>button’s look of horror turns into another smile as she walks past me and steps out of the shower
>”one faggot is enough for me for now” she says idly while drying herself
jimmieshavebeenrustled.png
>now I’m not exactly the idiot I might make myself out to be… but I am definitely quick to put trust into somebody, it’s a personal flaw
>probably why I never picked up on anything in 4 years that might have led me to suspect something was up… like the voice mask
>one time… button even convinced me that she was a vegetarian despite the fact we had previously discussed our love for steak in great depth about a year before
>it’s a flaw that button has always loved to exploit at my expense, and every time; in a new way that catches me off guard
>I turn the shower off and hop out, ‘serious look mode’ engaged
>button is quick to figure out what I intend to do… probably planned it even
>she bites her lip at me, “should I get on my knees? or are you going to teach me a lesson against the wall?”
>her comment sends blood rushing to my pecker and within seconds my heat-seeking moisture missile is armed and ready for deployment
>”wall” I tell her coldly as I grab her by the shoulder and waist, spinning her to face the wall opposite us
>she obliges and puts her hands out against the tiles, arches her back and pokes her butt out to give me clear access to her in an overly submissive gesture
>the fact that she is so WILLING to accept the internal spanking that I intend to give her just makes the whole thing that much hotter… and me, that much more determined
>don’t even plan to bust my nut… I just want to fuck my dignity back out of her at this point
>I grip her firmly by the hip and then spit into my other hand, working my saliva onto the tip of my cock to help it get started
>I can’t even believe how hard I am… I only just blew about 20 minutes ago and now I’m so hard I’m in danger of having a cock-aneurism
>I don’t think that’s a real thing by the way…
>I run my fingers through button’s penis receptacle, she’s already more slippery than a dolphin in heat swimming in a tub of petroleum jelly
>my knob slides in with ease and within a few strokes I am already pushing my full length deep into her cum sponge
>after making sure things are oiled and in working order, I grip buttons shoulder with my other hand and then push her into the cold bathroom tiles
>”HAAAAAAANONONONO” she protests and tries to push herself off
>I put my entire weight behind her and keep her pinned down as I continue to slide myself in and out of her
>button pants at the cold feeling against her stomach, hips and tits but there isn’t much she can do about it at this point and soon gives up any remaining struggle as she accepts her fate
>I grab her by the hair, turn her head to the side and push her cheek up against the wall
>”hhnnngg fuck anon…” she says as I clamp down on her neck with my teeth rather hard and continue to ram my missile in and out of her silo
>within seconds she tenses up and starts to cum for about the 4th time this morning, which only makes me pound her even harder, pulling on her hair and biting down on her neck
>after her moaning peeters down into a sort of sobbing pant, I slide myself out of her and release her from the wall
>button turns around and rests her back against the (now warm) tiles as she catches her breath, looking at me out of the corner of her eyes
>“did that make you feel better?” she half mocks me with a smile as I grab a towel from the rack and begin to dry myself off
>”surprisingly… yes” it’s the truth too, I feel more like a man after that
>”you could’ve kept going until you came if you wanted…” she trails off
>”it was supposed to show you who’s in charge” I tell her
>”of course! Whatever floats your boat faggot”
>button squeezes my ass affectionately as she walks past me and starts up the hair dryer
>”if it makes you feel any better, these teeth marks probably won’t disappear for a few hours” button says while looking at me through the mirror, flicking her hair to one side
>I walk up behind her and give her a peck on the neck where my clearly visible dental structure has now been imprinted on her, “sorry about that”
>”It doesn’t bother me” she offers with a slight shrug
>well so much for that… but still, it was fun and it lets me know I could probably even be rougher in the future, button certainly seems to enjoy when I use a bit of force
>somehow that doesn’t surprise me either, all things considered
>I decide to give up on trying to intimidate button for now and recuperate after this morning’s losses… and gains
>after getting dressed I decide to make coffee while I wait for button to finish with her hair
>I have a mid to low end single boiler espresso machine, nothing fancy but it does the job
>don’t use it very often though because I’m too fucking lazy with the milk frothing part
>inb4 hipster, I don’t grind my own beans or anything glorious, just pre-packed supermarket stuff
>only reason I know anything about coffee is because button worked part time after school and on weekends in a café as a barista
>all this stuff about how you gotta let the beans sit for a week after roasting or the crema will be bitter because of the carbon dioxide or something I don’t know… I just like coffee that doesn’t taste like it was filtered through a monkey’s asshole i.e. anything other than instant or maccas
>also, for the amerifags out there, when we talk about coffee here in Aus we are generally referring to a latte or a cappuccino, not the drip stuff that is common over in the states
>as I’m waiting for things to heat up and packing coffee into the… err… thing that you pack the coffee into, button finishes up in the bathroom and walks out to get changed
>I can’t help but stare as she unwraps the towel in front of the dresser and starts picking out something comfortable
>she doesn’t have any sort of tan line, typical considering she comes from the country and not a coastal town
>her hair flows down her back in soft and very loose sort of waves… she has nice wide hips too, they’re not hugely out of proportion, like crazy hourglass or anything…
>she just has very nice feminine curves
>well and truly enough to grip and hang on to I’ve learnt by this stage
>she doesn’t really have ‘dat gap’ or anything but I reckon if I got on my knees and looked straight at her ass I would see a tiny little window of blessed sunlight coming in from the other side
>she gets dressed in going out clothes, denim shorts and loose baggy sort of thin shirt… fuck I don’t know how to describe these things? I’m just going to find a picture of something similar and post it along with this… toohardfuckit
>button looks over at what I’m doing, “I’ll do that if you want anon” she tells me
>probably for the best I think to myself, hoping that she was going to step in and take over
>I’m interested to see button’s barista skills in action to be honest… figured it would be cool to watch
>I sit down at my computer and check my available funds, transferring a bit out of my savings and into my spendings account in preparation for the upcoming trip to the adult shop
>because I’m no longer working full time I try to be frugal with my savings, only spend money on necessities
>I therefore plan on sparing no expense on button’s new tail… plus it’s a MAJOR step towards maybe getting it into her ass…
>if she is willing to go this far then nothing is off the table at this point
>button is frothing the milk as I finish up and check out some news/weather
>sun for first half of today with thunderstorms and rain expected in the afternoon as well for the next few days
>perfect weather for not going outside!
>not like I had anything planned for the rest of the week… or the holidays to be honest
>it’s impossible to go out in the city without spending money… even public transport will set you back a few bucks by the time you get to and from wherever you are going
>button brings my coffee over for me and sets it down in front of me
>wonderful… she has drawn a penis into the froth with her barista coffee art skills
>she gives me a smile and walks back to make her own coffee
>I stare at the frothy genitalia floating in my mug, genuinely impressed at how well she managed to draw it
>”does it taste ok?” she taunts at me from the kitchen
>as I begin to sip the coffee I can’t help but wonder if she purposefully drew it rotated in such a way that when I drink from the mug it looks like I am sipping on the knob of a white foamy cock
>nah probably just coincidence I tell myself, she can’t be THAT good
>”delicious” I call out flatly
>”I knew you would enjoy it”
>oh come on…
>gotta give her credit… she is on a fucking roll this morning!
>figure it’s all worth it if she really does let me buy her a buttplug
>after sitting on the couch and chatting about random crap for a bit, we head off down to what could be considered the closest thing us muggles have to ‘Oliver’s wand shop’ in Diagon Alley
>only real difference is the wands are made of rubber and have an alkaline core to provide their magical power
>”is this your first time going into an adult shop like this?”
>”no of course not, there are about 7 in my home town” button says rather sarcastically, which is good, because if she had said there were any less than 5 and dropped the sarcasm, I probably would’ve believed her
>I’ve got no idea what small country towns are like but I wouldn’t let it past them to have a few adult shops next to the strip bar/family diner
>I have always been pretty open and honest about things like my sexuality
>buying condoms never phased me, neither did visiting sex shops with any of my ex’s… the way I figured it, the person behind the counter doesn’t give a fuck…it’s their job and it’s a product, they want to sell it to you to earn their wages
>they don’t giggle like a little girl every time somebody walks in and slaps condoms and lube on the counter, it’s just another paying customer buying regular everyday shit
>as we step into the shop, something resembeling Gollum’s mother gives us a polite smile
>turns out to be a lady, I can’t decide if she is genuinely about 150 years old, or has been smoking a packet of cigs every hour since she was 7, or murdered a hamplanet… skinned it and is now wearing it as part of some weird Wiccan ritual
>she seems pretty nice though… for a retired prostitute that was in her prime during World War 1
>button and I start browsing through the shop, pretty typical stuff, magazines, outfits, novelty items, Obama shaped dildos, Ronpaul buttplugs and of course a large selection of vibrators and other toys
>they do have some rather nice large beaded necklaces though, very stylish!
>at some point while button is studying the collection of fancy shaped vibrators that do all sorts of magical things like tickle your anus while spinning around in your vagoo, flicking your clit, charging your phone, feeding your turtle and making you breakfast all at the same time… I notice the lingerie section
>button would look fucking awesome in a pair of stockings I decide…
>never been huge on any of the more kinky sort of things, but because of how comfortable I am with button I’m starting to get a bit keen to try things
>I’m trying to decide what costume would suit button the best, army girl, nurse, police officer or maid, when the actual real life witch from behind the counter gets up from studying what I could only presume to have been the life extending chapter of a potion brewing tome; and comes over to the part of the counter closest to me
>I half expect her to start pulling long wooden boxes out from under the counter with rubber cock shaped wands in them and have me give each of them a little ‘swish n flick’
>”don’t let go of that one, she is a keeper!” she croaks at me in 2000 year old archaic Latin while gesturing towards button, who was now studying the fleshlights with curiosity
>”we have been best friends for years, no plan on stopping anytime soon!” I reply casually without even thinking about the words coming out of my mouth
>the talking dinosaur gives me a ‘oh you poor little beta faggot…’ sort of look before sliding back over to her tome
>wait… what? did I just friendzone myself to a dinosaur?
>she is probably already debating if she should bust out her old 386 and start green texting this shit up for a beta cringe thread using Netscape
>I contemplate adding “friends with benefits that is!” to what I said earlier… but I decide I’ve missed the opportunity, the damage has already been done
>she probably won’t even still be alive by the time we get home anyway…
>button has reached the tail section and is slowly working her way through each tail, feeling and inspecting each of them carefully
>I decide to take the opportunity to make my way back over to my ‘best friend’ to avoid further conversation with the lady
>she eventually settles on a big long dark brown one with a black rubber plug of decent length as opposed to a stub
>the colour matches her hair… which is probably what she was thinking but I decide not to point out the obvious
>it’s seems to be one of the top end tails in terms of quality thats for sure… the price reflects it as well
>”do you like this one?” she asks me whilst running her fingers down the fur
>”it’s your choice, it’s going in your ass” I tell her bluntly with a smile
>she turns and looks at me with a cheeky smile, “perhaps… but it’s your fetish” she says accusingly
>she seems rather cheerful about the whole thing
>I try to put myself in her shoes to get an idea why that might be… but to no avail
>I can’t think of anything cheerful about wedging a third of a kilo of silicone in my ass
>completely new found respect for button though…
>”alright then, definitely that one, colour matches your hair” I tell her, “but the plug is a decent size” I warn her, “positive you don’t want something smaller to begin with?
>she shrugs at me, “if you can manage 3 black dicks a day, I’m sure I can manage a single rubber buttplug”
>there it is… was waiting for something like this
>”did you want a vibrator or anything as well?”
>button looks down at my crotch and then back up at me, “don’t need one” she says
>”I don’t vibrate”
>”don’t need to” she retorts, before spotting a pair of steel handcuffs and moving to inspect them
>button reminds me of a kid in a lolly shop, jumping from one interesting looking candy to the next
>I can see the lady behind the counter watching us with a smile
>we must remind her of her great great great great great great grandkids or something
>apparently the handcuffs are one of the candies button is interested in purchasing because she carries them back over to me with a smile
>”are they for me… or for you” I ask her, a little dubious about her intentions
>button just shrugs, clearly she has no intention of elaborating so I don’t even attempt to ask
>”well if you are getting those, then I want these”
>not the choicest set of words to use in hindsight, considering I was now pointing at a pair of black stockings with a lace design at the top, no garter though
>they’re the type that come about 2/3 up the thigh and have that sticky shit under the lace at the top to stop them coming down
>button looks me up and down, “You will need to shave your legs first, but It’s good that you are being more open about your sexuality anon…” button begins with a friendly and supportive tone to her voice, “As your best friend, I will support you!”
>notevenmadbro… buying button a buttplugg…
>we take our lewt to the front counter, but not before I grab a large tube of silicon based anal lube… strawberry flavoured!
>as I dump all the things on the counter, I can’t help but notice the giant ugly old looking oval shaped ring on one of her fingers
>probably one of her horcruxes
>I gesture at button to put the handcuffs up on the counter
>”you pay for your toys anon, I’ll pay for mine” she says to me with a smile, loud enough that lady can hear her despite the fact her cochlea turned into a fossil centuries ago
>smooth button… really fucking smooth
>the old lady smiles at me as she begins scanning the items
>for a moment there I consider asking her what it felt like when she landed on the Australian shore with the first colonists over 200 years ago… but she probably gets that question a lot
>“is this your first toy dear?”
>I can see button smiling out of the corner of my eye
>oh fuck it… might as well just go along with this now, “yup! Sure is!” I offer in feigned enthusiasm
>”well take my advice sweetie and make sure you pick up an enema kit from the chemist on your way home”
>button nearly loses her shit before slapping her hand across her mouth
>I don’t even know what to say… so I just give an awkward sort of “ha…yeaaaah…” as I pay with my card
>I walk over near the door and wait for button to pay for the handcuffs
>which must look tame compared to my purchase… a pair of stockings, a tail buttplug and a bottle of strawberry flavoured ass lube…
ALPHA.mkv
>neither of us say anything as we leave the rubber penis emporium and start walking back up the street
>button just latches onto my arm as usual, ”what a nice old lady” she says while trying her best to contain her urge to laugh out loud
>”fuck you” I mumble while laughing with her, I can’t deny that it was one of the funnier things that has ever happened to me
>we don’t say much for about half the walk back, no need to… we aren’t in the habit of forcing conversation and button is a grill of few words
>”lets finish the campaign when we get home” she says about a block away
>spent the rest of the way home talking about strategies for where we were up to in Halo 4
>end up pretty pumped to finish things, her more so because I already know what happens
>we get home and dump the bags on the bed
>don’t get the wrong idea /b/rothers… I’m as keen as you are
>but as strange as it may seem, we don’t spend the ENTIRE day just blowing each other fyi
>besides we only just had lazy morning sex like an hour ago
>button takes the tail out and sits on the bed studying it for a bit, playing with the fur
>I make a couple of wraps for early lunch/late breakfast
>nothing fancy, ham, salad, sweet mustard pickles and bring them over to the coffee table along with drinks
>button has already changed into her comfortable but sexy shirtdress… fucking dumbest name, but I can’t call it anything else now
>about midday by now and it’s getting cloudy again
>just in case some people didn’t realise, December in Australia is summer… and due to bursts of intense heat and coastal setting, it is very common for us to get hot days followed by a few days of crazy rain and thunder
>I sit with my legs running up along the longer part of the L, my back towards the bed
>button sits with her legs running down the short part, resting her back against me and some pillows, no doona for now, still a bit warm
>we end having what would probably be the best time playing yet, we nearly piss ourselves with laughter when at one point two elites died and one had his head placed firmly in the other’s crotch on the ground
>we try to blast them apart with sticky grenades but they seem to have clipped into each other so that no matter where they blast to, they are still going at it
>sounds lame, but we spent a good 15 minutes nearly in stitches, to the point where button has to get up and go to the toilet
>button takes her sweet fucking time before eventually coming back out and sitting next to me again
>”had trouble getting it around the bend” I tease her, poop jokes aren’t anything new to us btw… just a little weirder now that she has had a gender swap
>”you have no idea” button says kind of awkwardly and with an uncomfortable look
>she packs some more pillows against my hip and lays down on her side, facing the tv, pulling the doona over her lower half
>by about 5 in the afternoon we are getting up to the final chapter, legendary is fucking brutal in Halo 4
>while a cutscene is loading I run my hand down button’s waist affectionately
>now that we are getting more comfortable with each other physically, I’m finding it hard to keep my hands off her, doesn’t seem to bother her though
>she has gotten just as handsy with me, always wanting to lay against me, or hold my arm when walking places, or play with my balls while we sit on the couch (and they think we are obsessed with boobs…)
>it’s not how you might think though… it’s not so much a romantic type of touching, more of a friendly and comfortable type…
>sometimes it’s genuinely affectionate, sometimes it’s out of curiosity… and other times it’s just plain because we want to
>it’s very hard to put into words… we just enjoy each other’s presence, I mean we have always had that on an emotional/friendship level (nohomobromance) it’s just, now there is a physical side to things that we are free to indulge in
>I drag my fingers back and forth over her curves, tracing the her pelvic bone where it sticks out as she lays on her side
>man her skin feels nice, I think to myself
>button looks up at me with a slightly mischievous smile… as if she knows something that I don’t
>I feel like I have just been struck by spaghetti as a farfetched thought pops into my head
>no way…
>I throw the doona back down over her legs…
>sure enough, flowing out from under button’s shirtdress is a long dark brown along with the brand new pair of black stockings
>doesn’t take much for me to figure out what her extended toilet break was all about, I just can’t believe how casually she went about it
>”that is so much hotter than I thought it would be” I inform her while taking in the sight like a Chinese tourist at Disneyland
>at this point I’m more curious than turned on
>”was it hard to get it in? did it hurt?”
>”it certainly wasn’t easy… like going to the toilet but in reverse” she says kinda bluntly
verylogicalexplanation.txt
>but my mood is quickly changing as images form in my head of button in the toilet, one leg up on the bath step as she slowly tries to push that plug into her
>”Is it uncomfortable?” I ask her with concern, suddenly very aware that she has spent the last few hours lying there with that thing inside her
>”actually… it’s kind of been turning me on…” she says as she gets up
>button stands in front of me, just out of arm’s reach and then spins around, looking over her shoulder at her cute new accessory hanging between her legs
>her shirtdress comes part way down her thigh, and the stockings come part way up, there is a couple of inches of skin revealed on her thighs in between the two
>It’s very hard to describe the sort of overall aura she gives off with the combination of things she is wearing… It’s not the sort of aura that has a specific name or set of words to describe it, trust me I thought long and hard when writing this trying to come up with some
>It would be much easier for me to describe the individual things that make it up… and let you form the image yourself
>button’s figure and face lend her a naturally aloof sort of feel… impassive even
>her shirtdress gives her a comfortable, uncaring and relaxed sort of look that suggests she prefers to spend her time in the moment rather than thinking about what is to come or has passed
>the stockings are the opposite of all that, they scream sexy, confident and strong…
>while the tail just looks absolutely adorable… as if it smooths over the sharp edges of all the other things… maybe a little playful and adventurous
>button straddles me, but as I move my hands around to start playing with tailbutt, she grabs both my wrists and stops me short
> she looks directly at me and shakes her head slowly while leaning in close
>”nope” she whispers
>but… but… muh fetish?
>“why not?” I sound like a 5 year old kid who has just been told they can’t open their presents until Christmas day
>”you can play all you want… AFTER you do something for me first” button declares, “after all it took me 15 minutes just to get the damn thing in… for you” she emphasises the last part
>it’s a blatant guilt trip
>but she does make a good point… this whole tail and buttplug thing is mostly for me
>I quickly compile a list of potential requests in my head
>hmm… make her squirt again? Nah that would be messy with a tail between her legs…
>maybe she wants me to go down on her first? If that was the case she might as well just let me play with the buttplug since it would be right there
>I smell something fishy going on here…
>and it’s not coming from between button’s legs, that thing is fresher than an isopropyl KFC towelette
>”what is it…” I inquire slowly and hesitantly
>”you have to say yes before I tell you what it is” she says as she hops up and stands out of reach at me once more
>this sounds like a trap
>she turns around and waves her bum so that her tail flows back and forth
>seven hells I want to see where that glorious thing terminates…
>”this is blackmail” I tell her bluntly, as I watch the tail wave back and forth like a fluffy pendulum
>”that’s the deal, take it or leave it faggot” she says as she puts her legs together, bends her knees, arches her back and then pokes her butt out at me
>yep this is most definitely a trap
>the arching of her back causes the shirtdress to creep up a little, but still not enough to reveal the tails origin
>the sight of button in front of me is slowly making my brain so numb with cheesy spaghetti that I can’t think of anymore possible things she might ask me to do
>question is… will whatever she requests from me be worth the chance to have a play with her toy and my fetish
>knowing also that button takes her promises seriously and would never forgive me if I backed out
Oh boy look at the time, its Tangent o’clock!
>a few years back I promised button that we would play BF3 all weekend on account of his(her) entire family being out and would be perfect opportunity to have BF3 marathon, pizza, late night and stuff (typical bromance weekend)
>I ended up going out and getting shitfaced, spending night at work colleague’s house
>to this day… button has NEVER let me live it down and holds it against me…
>and I feel bad whenever it’s brought up, because regardless of how petty it seems… I know how important just keeping my word is for button… let alone a promise
>now that I think on it though, it’s mostly just with me
>people are always going to let you down online… that’s the nature of the internet
>I remember It would still frustrate button when a guildie backed out of something or whatnot, but she definitely holds me to my word religiously so
>I think it’s definitely a family value or something, all the guildbros were pretty similar, although more forgiving than button
>In button’s defence however… not once in our entire friendship has she ever let me down, broken a promise or not kept her word on something
>which just makes me feel even worse damnit
>button reaches back and begins to lift her shirtdress up slowly, stopping JUST shy of the base of the tail, still leaving its origins as one of the most intriguing mysteries that I have ever encountered
>mind goes spaghetti… “yes”
>I must know, for the greater good of science and knowledge, I must investigate where that magnificent furry tail disappears into
>she spins around and smiles at me…
>it’s not a good smile…
>she walks over to the other side of the room and spins my computer chair so that its facing the middle of the room, “sit” she instructs me
>potentially kinky…
>however I get the feeling this is not going to benefit me in anyway
>why else would she bargain with me?
>she begins walking back over towards the bed
>I try to give her bum a smack on the way past, but she was expecting it and steps to the side
>once sitting on my computer chair, I begin to watch button as she rummages through the bedside that she decided to claim as her own
>I’m actually getting curious…
>she pulls a wooden box from the lower drawer and walks back over to me, placing it on the computer desk behind me
>the box looks hand crafted, certainly a very high quality design and make, richly detailed with bevelled corners and deep red stain to whatever exotic wood it is made out of
>mahogany maybe?
>I’m a metal expert… I don’t know a lot about wood
>on the top of the box I can see buttons initials carved into the wood and inlaid with what I presume to be brass
>I suddenly recall button mentioning her father did a lot of woodwork as a hobby outside of actual farm maintena-
>… wait…
>button moves over to the wardrobe and takes a spare towel out from the bottom draw before placing it on the desk behind me, a wicked smile still across her face
>no… no no no…
>she walks over to the kitchen and starts to fill up a large mixing bowl with hot water
>so much no…
>I look at the box now with dread instead of admiration
>button sits the bowl of steaming water behind me on the desk along with her building arsenal of torture devices
>”take your shirt off” she instructs me bluntly…
>”nope” I tell her…
>If dogs could talk, I imagine it’s exactly the same way a dog would say it when you tell them it’s bath time and they piss-bolt under the house
>button straddles me once more and moves in close, her lips nearly touching mine, her arms around my neck and her big brown eyes just inches from my face
>”at first… it hurt…” she begins, “but then after a few minutes it started to feel sooooo goood, as I pushed it deeper… and deeper inside of my tight little ass…” she confesses, slowly and with a SHOCKINGLY seductive tone to her voice, emphasising just the right words
>whendidyoulearntodothat?
>god she sounds so hot…
>she moves even closer to me, never breaking eye contact
>I can feel her breathing on my mouth
>”now don’t be a faggot… and take off your shirt” she whispers softly
>it was at this point I realised that button was actually a Jedi
>because I didn’t even hesitate tearing my shirt off just as she instructed
>I can’t help myself, I attempt to cop another feel of her ass
>button pulls back and slaps my hand away
>”hands behind your back…” she says with a playful look
>lolok!
>I know it’s probably all a charade… but it’s convincingly real enough for me at this point not to care
>button reaches behind me, her eyes still locked on mine with a deep gaze
>so pretty…
>I can feel her grab something from between the folds of the towel and brings it down towards my hand
>as soon as I felt the cold metal touch my skin, I knew exactly what it was…
>I knew exactly what she was about to do…
>button even knew that I was aware of what was about to happen…
>she knew that I was going to do absolutely… nothing… to stop her
>and so she took her sweet damn time doing it, savouring every moment that I willingly participated in her scheme
>fucking jedi powers…
>that’s the worst part and best part about it
>I didn’t even want to stop her…
>button moves in closer to me, her weight bearing down on my lap
>… not with those eyes, just inches from my face…
>I can feel cold metal closing around my left wrist
>… they look like they are made of deep dark milk chocolate…
>*click… click…* as the metal links slowly come together
>… her soft, supple moist lips…
> *click… click…* they close tightly
>….I can feel her warm breath against my face…
>button grabs my right hand and starts to pull it towards the left one
>… her hair smells like mangos…
>cold metal presses against my other wrist
>… our lips are nearly touching…
>*click…* the cuffs start to lock together
>… I can almost taste her…
>*click…*
>… so close…
>*click…* the handcuffs close tightly around my other wrist
>button moves her head around so that her lips are touching my ear
>”…good boy” she whispers at me before pulling back
>she showed me the cage, showed me what she was going to do, and then I just walked right into it
>and the worst part is I would do it all over again in a heartbeat
>my baloney pony is so hard right now that I could hammer a diamond back into carbon molecules
>button spins us both around on the chair so that the computer desk is to our right, it’s a fairly large glass top desk and I keep it clean, so there is plenty of room
>she sits the towel on my lap between us before flicking the two latches and lifting the lid on the wooden box
>inside is a combination of things, some I recognise, some I don’t
>there is what looks like a folded leather belt, a shaving cream brush, a round black container with a fancy gold logo on the top…
>and last but not least… held to the inside lid of the box is what I unmistakably identify as a cut throat razor with the word ‘Button’ engraved into the black handle in cursive
>she carefully unpacks the items as if each were worth their weight in gold
>this stuff obviously means a lot to her
>button wets her hands in the hot water and then starts to wet my face, smiling at me reassuringly
>I think mentioned earlier… I can go days without shaving, I don’t grow facial hair quickly,
>if I let it go a couple of weeks I can get a half decent beard going, I grew it right out once but I just don’t quite have the genetics to pull off a full blown beard
>it becomes too patchy where it joins onto my sideburns, so I just stick with a trimmed and deliberate afternoon shadow look
>at this stage I have some decent stubble, I am definitely due for a shave… but this is not exactly what I had in mind
>after getting my face nice and wet, she opens up the round container
>don’t need to be an expert to figure out it’s shaving cream… though it’s obvious from the looks of the white cream inside that it has never been used before
>button gets to work lathering up my face with the brush
>”You’re the first person I’ve used any of this on” button says with a sudden out of character gentleness
>I watch her as she works the cream into my skin, her eyes following her hand as she moves the brush around in small deliberate circles
>she looks relaxed and yet there is a certain confidence in her movements, like a dancer performing a well-rehearsed dance
>its oddly calming
>that is… until she pulls out the cut throat and flicks it open
>my testicles instinctively retreat up next to my liver at the sight of the blade
>I worked closely with metal for a living before I started uni… you could call me somewhat of an expert to the point that although I know nothing about cut throats, I recognised the brand name etched into the handle…. ‘Dovo’
>this was some serious high quality steel button was wielding…
>the fucking Lamborghini of cut throat blades
>I had no doubt in my mind that that thing was sharp enough to slice the foreskin off an aborted 4 month old foetus with surgical grade precision
>my feelings at this point were a confusing mix between fear, flattery, and ‘fucking aroused’
>fear because I had suffered some nasty gashes and cuts in the past, handling various types of high grade metal, which had left me with bit of a healthy paranoia around sharp edges
>flattery because button was allowing me to be the first person she used her kit on and I could tell it was a big deal for her
>and arousal because there is something very sexual about being handcuffed to a chair, straddled by a confident brunette wearing nothing but a shirt, stockings and buttplug, whilst wielding a 6/8” tempered stainless steel full hollow blade to your throat
>”just relax, faggot” button smiles as she grips the cutthroat deftly and raises it to my face
>she guides my head up and to the side so that she can see what she is doing more clearly
>the cold blade feels frightening at first when it touches my skin just below my sideburn, but as button starts to work it down my cheek in short confident strokes, I begin to relax into the chair
>it’s clear she knows what she is doing
>before long, button is manipulating my head around, gently stretching my skin and scraping away at it, wiping the blade on the towel constantly and dipping it in the water every now and then to clean it off
>I can’t help but stare at her, watching the calm and peaceful expression on her face as her eyes follow the blade around my face
>every now and then she meets my gaze momentarily before turning her attention back to the task at hand
>after the initial tension and fear of being sliced open dissipates, I start to find the whole experience incredibly intimate
>”you’re enjoying this aren’t you…” I remark at her, seeing it clearly in her expression…
>a rare event in itself really… being able to read button at face value
>button nods and smiles
>she switches hands and begins on the left side of my face
>wow! much ambidextrous! so dual wield! very skill…
>”does it remind you of home?” I ask her
>she doesn’t say anything…
>hope I didn’t hit a soft spot or something
>she drags the blade down the contours of my face with the same confident skill as she did in her other hand
>”my dad’s blade felt different to this one…” button says suddenly, “It was handed down to him when my grandad passed”
>she continues to work the blade down my neck, paying careful attention to my jawline
>”It was really old and the handle was worn, but not in a bad way…” she continues, drawing on her memories
>this is about the deepest button has ever been with me before
>”when dad was teaching me how to use it, he explained how each wear mark was a memory…”
>button carefully drags the blade over the top of my lip, pulling the skin tight with her other hand
>”…and that the reason it was so worn, is because it was full of so many memories”
>I can’t keep my eyes off button, I’ve never seen her like this
>her gaze shifts to meet mine as she suddenly becomes very aware of what she is saying
>”don’t give me that look faggot… I was 12” she says defensively
>button never really did care much for deep moments
>she turns her attention back to my face
>”anyway…” she says, her tone more relaxed again
>I have never heard her talk so honestly about something this way before… this is a side of her she has never shown me up until now
>”… that’s why even after I got my own blade for my 16th birthday, I still used dad’s old blade… when I did this for him”
>she goes over my face with her hand, inspecting her work before lathering up a few spots she isn’t happy with and going over them again
>if she is sad or feeling homesick, she doesn’t betray it in her voice or her expression, she talks as if ‘this is how it is, and these are the facts’
>button smiles suddenly “he said that… ‘one day I would find a nice man, and when I do, I should create my own memories with my own blade’ ” she says while pretending to impersonate her father’s tone of voice
>she uses the towel to wipe the remaining shaving cream off my face
>oh god… so much feels… its overwhelming…
allaboardthefeelstrain.avi
>she looks at me when she is done and places her hands on either side of my face, looking into my eyes once more and smiling
>”and instead… I found a faggot…”
>really? you couldn’t just give me ONE heart-warming moment?
>my turn to give her a blank look
>button just smiles back at me, pleased with her little joke… she never did enjoy deep or overly dramatic moments, always had to ruin them at the end
>though it’s not all bad, I could tell she was being honest before… I figure she just didn’t want things to get all ‘Celine Dion Titanic’
>”at least I was your first memory I suppose…” I mumble aloud, savouring what I can from the moment
>button slides her hand down to my crotch and starts rubbing, “memory isn’t over yet…”
whatatwist.gif
Note: my computer chair is the sort with a large high back on it. I know many of you may think “oh just stand up and lift your arms back over your head you cock mule”… but I can’t. I can’t lean forward enough to stand up, and the chair back is too wide to lift my arms up over… if you have a similar sort of chair, put your arms together behind it and try. Here is a picture of the exact model. Note that the arms fold up.
>button starts to kiss me while fondling with my trouser snake
>once she is satisfied that I am nice and hard, she brings her hand back up and sits further into me, grinding her crotch back and forth over the top
>”you can unlock me now… It’s my turn to play” I say as I nod towards her ass
>button looks at me with a sly smile
>she shakes her head slowly at me while biting her lip at me
>normally I wouldn’t mind this situation at all, button is the first girl I’ve ever had that didn’t just lay underneath me like a lump of lifeless jelly, or follow my directions without hesitation
>she thinks for herself, enjoys taking control and does what she pleases…
>BUT WE HAD A FUCKING DEAL!!!!
>iwanttoplaywithtailbutt…
>button starts to work her way down my neck
>it feels nice, kind of tickles… but I’m not convinced it’s the same as when I do it to her
>down further over my chest… down my stomach
>first time a girl has ever done this… its more enjoyable than I imagined it being…
>she pulls my pants off and gets between my legs, taking my purple-headed yogurt flinger in her hands
>button begins to work my shaft up and down very slowly while looking up at me
>”what’s the matter faggot?” she says looking down at my cock and then back up at me, “can’t move?”
>I’m not sure whether to give her a cold look… or a pleading look…
>button starts to run her tongue way too slowly up the underside of my tubesteak
>god fucking damnit… while I am most definitely a patient person, that goes out the window when it comes to all things sexual
>I don’t enjoy teasing, it just frustrates the shit out of me
>not literally though, that would be awkward
>I’m starting to think that’s the point as button’s tongue reaches my knob
>being cut doesn’t help, nowhere near as sensitive as uncut fags so this kinda just feels… warm and moist?
>I think that’s the worst part, while it would probably have uncut fags writhing in pleasure, it just makes me want to turn the outside of her pussy into a nutsack blackboard
>button takes me into her mouth, slowly and very gently moving down over my German helmet, using plenty of spit and still slowly working my shaft up and down with her hands
>I lean back and look up at the ceiling, letting out a sigh of frustration
>”unlock me… and I promise you won’t regret it…” I try to bargain with her
>she just looks at me and mouths out ‘nope’ silently
>button has worked up a good amount of saliva now and uses it to slide her hand up and down over my knob as if it were lube, slowly but firmly… it feels fapping fantastic
>I decide to get nasty, “you have to sooner or later… the longer you leave it… the worse it’s going to be for you when I get off this fucking chair”
>”I’m counting on it…” she says before taking my cock back into her mouth
>her pace is teasingly slow and delicate… to the point where it’s making me want to tie her down and use her throat as the worlds most realistic fleshlight
>”JUST…” I stop myself, taking a deep breath before calming down before I end up giving her exactly what she wants
>a pair of pre-cum stained rustled jimmies
>”just… what…” she says, looking at me with a smile, now playing with my balls in one hand, and slowly working my spit-lubed shaft back and forth with the other
>deep breaths, just let her tease… who cares… you are calm, level headed guy… she is trying to draw something out of you that isn’t there… it’s button… this is how she gets off… by making you mad bro…
>”say it…” she adds, slowing her pace down even more
>meditation mode engaged… must unlock my inner chakras
>”I’ll do it… if you say it” button taunts at me
>fuck it, I can’t take this…”just make me cum”
>she turns her head to the side slightly, “just make me cum…..what?”
>look back at the ceiling and let out a frustrated sort of laugh, oh it’s perfectly clear now…
>she is going to make me beg
>”will it change anything even if I do beg?”
>button just shrugs… “only one way to find out isn’t there faggot?”
>”please…”
>”please what?…”
>I am going to pin her down, pretend her asshole is Nagasaki and then repeatedly drop my ‘fatman’ on it until it’s destroyed
>”please make me cum”
>button hops up and spins around, revealing the dark brown long tail hanging down from under her shirtdress
>she puts her hand between her legs and starts playing with herself, I can’t see it though because it’s blocked by the glorious tail
>eventually she flicks the tail up onto my chest and backs her ass up so that it’s just sitting over my flesh flute
>she grabs a hold of me and slides my knob back and forth over her wet slit
>I drop the attitude, ”please…” I beg her in earnest
>button lowers herself slowly
>I can feel her lips part around my knob even though I can’t see it happen
>however I can see the base of the buttplug lodged firmly inside her… this makes me feel much better about the whole situation
>her tight hole starts to stretch out to accompany me as she slowly goes lower
>and then just as I feel my German helmet disappear into her hot wet war trench… she stops and just starts working my shaft up and down with her hand
>”oh come on…” I let out in frustration as I try to thrust my hips upwards but to no avail
>button raises herself back up off my cock as I do it and turns back around, shaking her head “uh ah”
>”alright alright… I’m sorry… I won’t move…” I plead in defeat
>”should’ve thought about that before you started jumping ahead” button says as she gets back down and goes back to slowly teasing me with her mouth
>which is actually twice as hot now considering she is licking her own juices off me
>I feel like any minute I’m going to start growing huge and green with sexual rage, breaking the cuffs apart and screaming “HULK CUM!!!!”
>not even the entire US armed forces would be able to stop me from laying thermo mutant nuclear semen destruction to every one of button’s orifices at that point
>I take a deep breath, in through my nose, out through my mouth, “when I get out of these cuffs…”
>”you will what..” button looks up at me expectantly
>I hadn’t actually thought about that bit yet…
>”how about you unlock them and find out” I say it with as much conviction as I can, trying to convince her I’m serious
>she smiles and then stands back up, turning back around and lifting the her tail up to reveal her now visibly dripping ‘erection correctional facility’
>button lowers herself back down onto me, taking me all the way in this time
>I close my eyes, enjoying the well over due sensation as she, still slowly… lifts herself back up and then back down again
>the fur of the tail tickles my stomach as I feel her warm wet hole envelope me over and over again
>it’s an odd sensation, but not a bad one
>I feel like I understand why people use feathers and things now, as I watch the tail move around on my crotch/tummy as button sits up and down carefully
>goddamn I want to tug on that thing so bad
>she starts to make cute little noises while she sits up and down, taking deep long strokes
>each time she lets me enter back into her, I can feel the hard rubber buttplug on my knob through the walls in the next cave over
>I suddenly realise that the reason she was taking it so slow was because of that… I completely forgot that the plug was of decent length and size, she is essentially working double time trying to stuff two holes at the moment
>new found respect for button
>the thought has me off and running towards the finish line though
>button reaches back and pulls her ass cheeks apart as she starts to move a little faster, her breathing much more intense
>is she about to climax? Jesus when did this become too flipping awesome?
>she puts her hands on my thighs to help keep herself up and she starts backing her wiener wagon onto me with much less finesse than before, but quicker and harder
>suddenly button begins to whimper slightly, her fingers dig into my thighs and I can feel her hot pocket tighten around my ham burrito as she buries herself down into my crotch, taking the full length of me with her while she cums
>if only my hands were free
>she sits with my full length inside her for a bit as she recovers before sliding back off me and spinning back around down onto the ground to face me once more
>I raise an eyebrow at her with a ‘well then’ expression on my face while she kneels between my legs, breathing through clenched teeth
>”shut up…” she mutters under her breath
>I guess that was not part of plan?
>”you know… if you unlock me… I could give you even more of that?”
>she shakes her head, undeterred…
>damn it was worth a shot at least
>button takes her shirtdress off, revealing her gravity defying jello mounds before taking my cock back into her hands
>she begins jerking me properly while she gets her breathing under control
>at which point she takes me back into her mouth and starts working both the shaft and head in tandem
>oh thank god… she is being serious about it now too
>after everything that has happened, it only takes her 5 minutes or so before I’m starting to edge
>she has learnt what to feel for when I’m getting close now and slows right down as soon as she notices the signs
>”don’t do this… come on button be reasonable” I plead with her
>I get nothing but a sly smile in return
>”cum whenever you want faggot… I’m not stopping you”
>button opens her mouth and sticks out her tongue, resting my knob just in her mouth while looking right at me
>she might not be stopping me… but she certainly isn’t doing much to help me either, I think to myself as she slowly works my shaft up and down
>sooo fucking clooose… come on just a bit faster
>she has the speed down packed perfectly… I’m just sitting right on the line
>I try to think of hot thoughts, her buttplug lodged in her, her soft tongue resting on my knob…
>but I can’t concentrate with the all the frustration
>she stays like this for at least another 5 minutes, every time I think I’m about to go over, she just stops what she is doing all together
>every time I start relaxing she takes my knob into her mouth again, bringing me back to the edge
>it’s almost unbearable
>button is enjoying every minute of watching me tense and wriggle in frustration
>”how bad d…”
>”really really really fucking badly!” I cut her off, throwing the comment at her through gritted teeth
>”what’s the magic word?” she taunts
>”pleasegodamnit!!!”
>”say it like you mean it faggot…” she snaps
>I look at her, my knob still resting on her tongue as she slowly pulls my shaft up and down at the perfect speed to keep me dead in the water…
>”…please” I say half pleading and half begging
>button starts to jerk my twinkie properly, still looking at me with it pointed right into her mouth
>she’s ready for the banana filling now it seems
>my reaction is fucking instantaneous… it feels like somebody just injected a whole 7 marijuanas into my penis…
>tidal waves of intense feels ripple outwards from twinkie ground zero and up through my body as I start blasting out cream filling with the force of an angsty teenage blue whale
>if you could replay things in slow motion it would have resembled a porno remake of the opening scenes of saving private ryan…
>some of it goes in, some of it runs down back out her mouth, and some of it just vanishes down the back of her throat all together as I paint my magnum opus all over her soft pink canvas mouth
>when I’m finally done, button looks like a special ed kid that managed to get into the clag glue cupboard…
>she doesn’t even bother trying to swallow most of it, just pushes it back out and lets it cascade down her glorious chest
>she looks at me and smiles biting her lip, “that was hot…”
>the image before me incredible, button on her knees, beautiful naked smooth glossy skin, black stockings, tail hanging from the buttplug in her ass and my cum all over her chest and mouth
<WARNING: EXPLICIT IMAGE – CLICK TO VIEW>
(opens in new tab)
>this must be how Leonardo da Vinci felt after he finished painting the Mona Lisa
>I just rest my head back against the chair as button stands up and wipes herself off with the towel nearby
>”that was fucking incredible…” god honest the best orgasm I have ever had in my life up until that moment
>I knew about edging but I never had the willpower to do it properly
>button straddles back onto my lap, her warm naked body on top of mine and I can feel the soft furry tail tickling my legs as it dangles from her ass
>she looks at me and smiles softly, extremely satisfied with herself, “are you still mad?”
>”you have no idea sweetheart” I say through clenched teeth
>”I’m not your sweetheart… faggot” she says and moves in to kiss me
>don’t even care if I’m practically cannibalising my own leftover semen… no fucks given at this point
>her kiss is oddly passionate and honest, which is a direct contrast to her comment about not being her sweetheart
>I don’t want to spaghetti the moment, but I have to ask the question or it will eat me alive
>as she pulls away I decide to word it as openly as possible
>”but you are mine…” I try to make it a cross between a statement and a question
>button looks at me, studying the look on my face
>she leans in close again, taking the key from the desk behind us and begins to unlock the cuffs
>I can feel her erect nipples pressing into my chest as she continues to look at me
>”what do you think… faggot” she whispers to me before kissing me once more
>I feel the cuffs slip off and button places them back on the desk
>fortunately for her, It feels like I just blasted most of my soul down her throat and I’m feeling rather relaxed after everything in hindsight
>I run my fingers up along the fabric of her stockings, up her smooth thighs, up the soft warm skin on her waist, and then across her back
>button gets goosebumps, as I drag my fingers down again towards her ass
>finally get a chance to cop a feel, even if I’m not in the mood to do anything now, I still want to check it out
>my fingers slide over the plastic plug firmly inside of her, I split my fingers in two and run them under the stopper part, lifting the plug out slightly so that the thin part at the base goes between my fingers
>I can feel the lube still present as well as button’s tight asshole stretched around the plastic
>man I wish I hadn’t just blown…
>button pulls away from my mouth and looks at me as I move on to play with the tail
>”is it still comfortable?” I ask her
>she just nods
>”so how long until we can play hide the sausage in there?” I ask her as she hops off my lap and puts her shirt back on
>button heads back to the bathroom, I presume to take it out now that the fun is over
>”I don’t remember ever agreeing to that, you faggot” she says as she disappears through the door
>”I’m not asking for permission at this point!” I call out after her
>put some clothes back on and decide to follow her in, hoping I can catch her mid removal or something
>too late, the plug is sitting next to the sink, still wet with water after being cleaned
>button is brushing her teeth in front of the mirror
>I give her a disappointed look but she just stares back at me blankly
>”my boobs are still sticky… I’m going to have a quick shower” she declares after a moment
>”anything in particular you feel like for dinner?” I ask her as she nonchalantly strips off her shirt in front of me and steps up into the shower
>”surprise me faggot” she says coolly
>as I’m walking out of the bathroom she calls after me, “wait”
>I turn to face her, raising my eyebrow “mmmm?”
>”did you like the tail?” button asks earnestly
>”I’m still amazed you got it in…” I confess to her, “but it was definitely a very…”
>put on my pair of black aviators…
>“filling experience”
YEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHH.csi
>after opening and closing my fridge and pantry a total of 4 times each, I decide to make chicken, mushroom and capsicum fajitas
>I think that’s the right one, maybe quesadilla?
>getting the ingredients ready
>phone rings, not my phone though
>”can you get that for me?” button yells out from the bathroom, the door is still open, “thanks faggot!”
>I pick the phone up off ‘her’ bedside table
>wow this really escalated quickly didn’t it, I think to myself as I realise the gravity of ‘her bedside table’
>”Hello, This is button’s phone?”
>used to have calls all the time in my section of the hangar as an apprentice… got used to phone etiquette
>”… Anon??… is that you?” I hear a guy ask from the other end
>”err… yeah?” I say while sitting down on the edge of the bed
>”it’s me, thirdyoungestbro!”
>just to clarify, when I number these bros, I am still considering button is youngestbro because that’s exactly what she is really. So thirdyoungestbro is the second youngest of her brothers, would be like 27 or something at this point now, few years ahead of me
>”oh hey mate! What’s going on?” I ask casually
>”not much champ, where is button?”
>”sorry she is in shower atm” I explain
>”… … she? What do you mean anon?” he says, suddenly very serious tone
>”haah!… it’s cool man, was a bit of a shock at first but I understand all the reasons and why”
>”… … I don’t understand, how are you so sure button is a she…”
>I know he is playing with me… but it’s still scary as fuck… thirdyoungestbro is in navy, won’t say as what, but definitely would NOT want to fuck with this guy, or any of them for that matter
>”well you know…” fuck what do I say?
>”no I don’t know anon… tell me”
>threat level 5!!!!
>button walks out of the bathroom and towards me, wrapped naught but a towel
>”well I guess I don’t know for sure…”
>damage control… DAMAGE CONTROL
>button pushes me back down onto the bed and climbs on top of me
>”you sounded pretty confi…” Button takes her phone from me before he can finish
>phew… threat level reduced back down to level 2
>”Oh leave anon alone, he’s tired, we have been busy all day” button says casually
>threat level 5!
>she and her brothers talk an incredible amount of shit to each other, it’s a very tough love sort of family but once you spend enough time talking and listening to them, you begin to understand that they are very tight knit really…
>no doubt in my mind they would all line up and give me a firing squad style execution if they found out about the things I’ve been doing to button
>worst part is I can actually imagine button standing there with a casual smile as she says “bye faggot!” when the order is given
>”relax… just playing games and stuff” button says as she unwraps the towel from around her, revealing her naked smooth skin and supple firm breasts
>’and stuff’…
>understatement of the year award goes to… BUTTON!!!!
>she looks down at me and silently mouths ‘finger me’ before quickly continuing her conversation “yeah that should be fine, anon won’t mind”
>I want to shake my head… I really do…
>wait fine with what? What is happening? WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?
>button grabs my hand and pushes it between her legs, her sweaty love box is slippery with nectar
>I manage to the next category… most awkward boner of the year award!
>“alright then, sounds like a plan you fucknugget” button says to her brother
>as my hand rests on button’s, I feel her begin to push her own fingers inside of herself as she grits her teeth and closes her eyes
>she is being dramatic… but I don’t want to stop her… I’m starting to enjoy her little performances
>”oh wait, can you bring some things with you?” button says as she pulls her fingers out and guides my hand in to replace hers, “yeah I’m going to stay with anon, he has plenty of room”
>I’m too caught up in the moment to care… plus there is NOTHING sexier in the world than a freshly washed and shaved pussy already wet with she-juice
>any anon that has experienced this glorious feeling will attest to this fact
>the feeling of shaved clean dry skin contrasting next to… hold on… bring things with you? what?
>”my desktop, computer chair and desk…” button puts the fingers that were just inside of her into her mouth and sucks them clean
>“and my dressing gown, I left it in the bathroom and I’m tired of having to walk around naked after I finish showering because anon won’t bring a towel in for me” button continues just as I get my index finger as far into her as it can go
ITSATRAP.jpg
>I pause, I can hear some loud noises on the other end of the phone and button smiles at me
>this is getting dangerous… eject…EJECT
>but button has other plans as she puts her hand on mine as I start sliding my finger out
>she puts her hand over mine again and guides both our fingers back inside of her
>”oh and can you ask mum if I can have nan’s old tea table and chairs from the shed?”
>do you see what you have done?, I think to myself… do you see what you have gone and created anon?
>button takes her finger out and leans down so that our faces are nearly touching, propping herself up with one hand on my chest
>I’ve created something beautiful… but it’s also too dangerous to allow to keep on living, I will need to put button down
>button looks right into my eyes, playful smile on her face as she enjoys my awkwardness to the situation
>“I love you” she says right to my face all of a sudden
>… … …
>“yeah I’ll talk to you soon poofter, tell mum and dad I love them too”
>I know she did it deliberately… I know she was messing with me, but it didn’t stop my heart from misfiring like a meth addict mid way through a heart attack
>button gets off me as she hangs up and moves to get dressed now that her little game is finished
>she puts on one of my shirts, it JUST covers the bottom of her ass
>no bra or undies
>I lay there, still trying to come to terms with everything that just happened…
INCOMING TANGENT
>button knows how easily I become invested in a situation, and she loves throwing curveballs to watch how I react to situations
>If I could sum up my friendship with button over these years; I would be the passenger on a rollercoaster as button lays down the tracks in front of me
>say what you want, call me pathetic, beta, whatever you want… no fucks given
>that’s just how it has always been between us and how it will probably remain, we just work like that… that’s our friendship, and we enjoy playing off each other in that way
>she loves to lay down the tracks, creating the steady climbs as well as the intense drops and loops
>and I enjoy just going along for the ride… for the most part
>I guess I find it a nice change of pace
>at work, in relationships, with friends, god don’t even get me started with group projects at uni… I always tend to be the one that makes decisions or chooses directions
>don’t get your panties in a twist, I’m not claiming to be a born leader or anything of the sort…
>it’s just why I enjoy what I have with button so much, because it’s the opposite of all that
>”do you need a hand with dinner?” button asks nonchalantly, laying down some more smoother tracks in front of me now that she has had her fun
>”yeah, thanks” I respond absently… still lying on the bed
>I can’t decide how that made me feel… when she looked at me and said those words
>it didn’t make me feel bad though…
>hop up and walk over to the kitchen, still off in the clouds
>suddenly I come spiralling back down to reality faster than an unwanted Chinese baby being flushed down the toilet
>”your brothers are coming here…” it’s more of a realisation than a question
>button nods as she begins to dice the capsicum and mushroom, “Thursday evening”
>”why?” it’s a slightly obvious question but button tends not to elaborate unless I get specific…
>probably to give her more opportunities at calling me a faggot
>inb4 faggot I think to myself
>”because I’m here?… faggot”
>doesn’t count, called it
>I leave it open, knowing she will eventually tell me the real reason
>her subsequent explanation is long and to the point, so I will sum it up for you guys
>secondyoungestbro is going on exercise soon, just training shit but still it is first one because pretty fresh in and all
>thirdyoungest bro (also in the forces) is coming down to see him off after saying goodbye to parents back up at hometown
>gonna stop here for few days to get shitfaced and celebrate
>they already have hotel setup so they can bring chicks back to smash (button isn’t an idiot, she knows what her brothers are like, doesn’t bother her, says they can fuck all the dumb sluts they want for all she cares)
>they want to stop in and say goodbye baby sister (awwww)
>button took opportunity to have them bring down some stuff now that she has ‘found a place to stay’
>”thirdyoungestbro also said to tell you that he wants to have a word with you, wants to know if you would be free to grab a beer on Thursday night”
>I can already half guess what sort of a talk that is going to be… suppose I would do same thing if I was him though
>”why the table and chairs?” I ask her, remembering that it was one of the things she mentioned
>she gives me a blank look
>yeah well ok, so I guess that’s kind of a dumb question, “never mind”
>button goes back to dicing as I fry off the chicken and onion
>I guess it just hadn’t occurred to me until that point that it was now ‘our’ place rather than ‘my’ place and so that it wasn’t unusual for her to move a few things in
>another very surreal moment when I realised that
>”you still haven’t told me how much rent is…faggot” she says coolly as she finishes up with the dicing and passes me a bowl
>”just start paying next week, I did say you could crash here for a bit anyway” I’m not trying to be overly generous here, rent is due on Monday, makes it easier if she just starts paying at the start of the week
>”just give me a figure that includes everything” she persists
>so many things going through my head… I’m trying to concentrate on dinner while i tally up numbers on things like internet and food for two
>what was my last electricity bill? Its quarterly isn’t it? Or was it every 3 months?
>”and don’t get faggoty… make sure its half” she continues
>I wonder where I will put the table and chairs, middle of room? Up against the back of the couch? Is she going to want to put her battle station next to mine?
>”because if you don’t, I will tell my brothers that you are making me pay for the rent with sex”
>brain reaches full capacity… it reminds me of slut 2, she used to nag and nag until I couldn’t think straight, mind just eventually went blank and I would snap at her…
>I hated the feeling, I hated her for bringing that out in me,
>I hated the fact that I was about to do it again…
>“ALRIGHT!! Fuck… I get it, just give me a second to process all this shit button” I snap at her
>the moment the words leave my I regret them… not because of buttons feelings, she’s a big girl
>just regret snapping in general… I hate that feeling… that moment where it all bubbles over and you lose control
>I will admit it /b/… I think I might be a bit of a control freak
>not the creepy kind though, to much of a push over for that ha!
>I just don’t like not being in control of a situation, I suppose this relates to what I mentioned in my previous tangent…
>I take a deep breath and look up at the wall in front of me… calming my shit and trying to sort out which problem to deal with first, dinner, rent, probable castration by buttons brothers, where to put new furniture…
>dressing gown? Really?
>no… that’s all trivial bullshit…
>that’s not what has me more jumbled up than an autistic kid trying to recite his ABC’s while being tasered
>what exactly are button and I right now…
>and why did I get that weird feel when she said those words
>what feeling was that? Was I happy? Confused? Scared? All of the above I have a feeling
>after awhile I turn to button to see how she has decided to react to my outburst
>I know her better then to be butthurt about it
>after all she was poking at me to try and get a reaction out of me
>still though… I’m not entirely sure what to expect
>to my surprise I find button smiling up at me with a gentle expression on her face
>her soft brown eyes melt away all my frustration within seconds
>suddenly
>”you’re doing it again… faggot” she says as she moves the chicken I was trying to cook off the hotplate and sets it aside
>”could have just asked me what was wrong…” I reply, a little sourly, “you know… like normal friends do”
>”you would have lied” button quickly retorts “besides… we aren’t normal friends anymore are we?”
>she poses this last part as a question with a smile and a raised eyebrow
>I’m genuinely worried that the FBI are going to rock up at the door one day and steal button away from me so that they can clone her and put the copies into the tips of their latest intercontinental ballistic missile prototypes…
>because when it comes to homing in on the problem… she does it with absolute PINPOINT fucking accuracy, every time…
theforceisstrongwiththisone.jedi
>”let me guess… you felt my heart skip a beat when you pulled that little joke on the phone or something stupid like that”
>I remember she did rest her hand on my chest again as she did it… wait was it even the right side?
>its to much effort to keep track of all this stuff…
>”didn’t have to, it was written all over your face the moment I said it, faggot” she says bluntly
>there is short pause before she gives me an expectant look as if to say ‘well… go on’
>It might not seem obvious to the rest of you, but button has a knack for knowing the root cause of a situation
>she will almost always push me to just come out and tackle it head on knowing that I will just dance around it otherwise
>we both know what the question on my mind is… would I ask it if it wasn’t for button pushing me? >probably not
>I have a bad feeling about this though… her confidence and openness tells me it isn’t going to be a fairy ‘tail’ ending (seewhatIdidthere?)
>but then she’d probably be the same way even if it was going to be good news right? Confident and… oh fuck it… here goes nothing…
>”…do you love me?”
>”of course I do…” she says instantly and without hesitation
>I feel like I’m starting to float off the ground!
>“we have been best friends for over 4 years now…”
>definitely sinking now… but I should clarify what she means now or it’s gunna eat away at me until I snap again
>“what type of love?” I say, unable to control the disappointment in my voice
>I don’t even know why I’m disappointed either… 4 years we have been friends, if she asked me honestly if I was in love with her right now… I don’t think I would know the answer
>so why does her answer bother me so much?
>looks like despite what I thought, I got ahead of myself again
>”there aren’t different categories you faggot” button suddenly says
>she is looking at me with a ‘you have it all wrong’ expression
>“I love my mum, I love my dad, I love my brothers, I love my dog and I love you”
>”yeah… but you love each of them differently?” I say, frustrated at her denial of the categorization of love after just admitting it existed…
>“you love your family like a family, you love your dog like a pet and you love me as a best friend” I try to explain to her
>”no… that’s not what I said…” button snaps back at me
>what is this? Some sort of twisted joke? Even button isn’t this much of an ass
>”I love my mum the way I love my mum, I love my dad the way I love my dad, I love each of my brothers as the brothers they are, I love my dog the way I love my dog…” button explains as if it was clear as day…
>“… and I love you the way I love you…”
>she has dropped the smile and gentle tone, now it’s more of a lecture
>”It’s not family love, or pet love, or best friend love… there aren’t different types, that’s not how it works you tard”
>she turns back to grating the cheese in front of her
>”it’s not black and white like that…” she says with a softer more controlled tone
>this is some Jedi wisdom right here yo…
>she turns back to look at me, “I thought you were an expert on this, Mr ‘look at how many people I’ve dated and been fisted by” she quips at me before turning back to the task at hand once more
>I completely ignore that last part, just her attempt to lighten the mood…
>I’m far too invested in this conversation to joke just yet
>button has just completely demolished my concept of love and made me look like a complete fucking idiot…
>I can’t even argue with what she says… because I don’t disagree with her
>”so then… how do you love me?” It was more a thought… but It kinda slipped out
>button stops once more and stares at the block of cheese she is grating… clearly giving her answer some thought
>she turns to face me, not looking up at me though, eyes still forward with that trademarked neutral face… unreadable… no hint of what is about to come
>”I don’t know… it keeps changing each day…” she says finally
>oh come on that is the most ambiguous answer In the world
>she looks up at me, “but definitely not the same as it was before Friday” button says with an honest little smile
>”after all…” button pauses and gives me a ‘knowing’ sort of expression before taking on an exaggerated tone of voice, “I WAS pure and unbroken until you went and defiled me”
>”oh fuck off…” I hurl at her as she turns back to the cheese with a huge grin on her face
>I process what she just said earlier
>last Friday we were best friends
>implying that it is more than that now
>mfw
>it is still a semi ambiguous answer…
>but the more I think about it the more I realise how much of an idiot I’m being
>after all she did willingly let/make me he first for… well practically everything?
>besides, button would never beat around the bush or give a deliberately vague answer, goes against everything she is
>so I know that she was being as honest as possible, she clearly just has a very different concept of love to me
>and while I don’t fully understand it at this point, her concept is definitely very fitting for her
>love with no catagories or sterotypes
>simply ‘no bullshit button love’…
>with the mood completely turned around, we spent the rest of making dinner trying to figure out what we were going to do for the rest of the evening
>Not that the choices were huge… finish off Halo 4, play another game, or watch movie
>despite the fact we were a little Halo 4’d out… I knew how close we were to the ending and after letting her know that we settled on just brute forcing our way through it
7>no sleep or further sexy times until we had finished we agreed
>”can you put your tail back in?” I ask her casually as we sit on the couch with a mouthful of chicken fajita
>button thinks about it while chewing
>”you did agree to let me play all I want once I agreed to your little stunt, plus you said it turned you on…” I try to persuade her
>”I never said WHEN you could play” she contests
>”don’t pull that shit… you wouldn’t let it slide if I tried to pull that on you…” I tell her accusingly
>I know what is coming… walked right into it
>button smiles at me, “fair enough” she says before taking another mouthful, “but I will need to go to the toilet first…” she declares with a certain lack of tact
>what? no faggot?
*There are certain things that I will leave out as I tell you my tale /b/rothers… let’s just say taking the old ladies advice and picking up the enema kit from the chemist is one of those choice details. Although I will confess that she has a remarkably good diet so I am fortunate in many aspects. Lets leave it at that.
>after dinner button heads off to the toilet
>”don’t I at least get to put it in?” I call out to her as she begins closing the door
>”sure…” she begins
>TOOT TOOT! MAKE WAY FOR THE STEAMIN SEAMEN SUBMARINE!
>“…except we agreed no sexytimes until AFTER we finish the campaign”
>aaaanndd there it goes, back up into my loins… it was worth a shot
>about 10 minutes later, button comes back out of the toilet
>long dark brown tail swishing behind her
>best fetish is best fetish
>”can I at least se…” I begin to inquire as humbly as possible
>”faggot” button cuts me off as she makes her way over to the dresser
>that doesn’t even make sense…
>I can’t help but eye her curiously from the couch, shes up to something… I can tell
>she pulls out a pair of thigh high socks and begins sliding them onto each leg
>the slow and erotic way in which she does it quickly makes it obvious she’s trying to tease me
>though I should know better then think it would stop there
>after her little solo ‘performance’, button comes over to the couch where I’m sitting in my usual position, the corner where the short part of the L and the long part of the L come together
>she lays down on her tummy lengthways down along the short L
>her head facing the TV and sock covered feet in my lap
>except now as I look ahead at the TV, half of my peripheral vision is taken up by buttons glorious behind
>she hasn’t even bothered to pull down her shirtdress which has ridden halfway up her ass when she lay down
>how the fuck am I suppose to focus on sniping covenant
>when button is presenting half her ass and an all to teasing view of the soft tail that seems to magically terminate somewhere between the depths of her left and right butt cheek
>not to mention the socks… they turned out to be far more effective than I thought they would’ve been
>as distracting as the sight is… I try to use it as encouragement to perform my best, rewarding myself with a good stare between combat heavy areas
>we quickly get back into the final stages of the campaign and before long we are doing exceptionally well
>buttons pushes forward from cover to cover, blasting, jumping and pistol whipping her way through any of the mobs hiding in the thick of things
>I try to get into high positions or places of advantage where I can keep my partner covered… and slack off to steal glances
>button keeps deliberatly fidgeting, constantly drawing my attention back to the event horizon that is occurring an arms length away, deep within buttons ass crack
>this mysterious even shall henceforth known as ‘The Pluggening’
>and as a man of science, it is my obligation
>no…
>it’s my duty, to one day soon lead an expedition into the even horizon and plant my meatpole flag
>IN THE NAME OF SCIENCE!
>also… can’t help but notice how nice button’s feet are
>I have always found foot fetish stuff a bit weird…
>until I found 4chan, then I realised it was one of the world’s most tamest fetishes compared to the other stuff out there that people get off on
>I remember browsing a couple of feet threads early on in my newfag career
>you know, just out of curiosity
>but it didn’t do much for me
>I mean I admit there are definitely cute feet and ugly feet, but the cute ones were nothing more then that… cute
>certainly nothing sexual about it for me
>It was no different here, button has nice feet…
>I like them
>not sure where I was going to go with that truth be told
>we are nearing the very final stages of the campaign and things are getting intense
>things are also getting rather intense in my pants as we draw near to the end…
>I know how much we have left, so each time we get closer, I essentially think of it as one step closer to the unban on sexytimes
>which makes things even more doubly intense
>switch out one of my guns for that giant over the shoulder cannon thing
>willy switches himself out for a single barrelled pump action protein cannon
>I start blasting hot loads of plasma, trying not to hit button
>willy twitches, informing me he intends to do the exact opposite when we finish
>so close to button
>I try to smack button
>I can’t smack button… too much love for button
>die
>button beats down the guy that killed me and calls me a faggot
>button hits the button that I was trying to hit, the button that initiates the ending cutscenes
>button is love
>button is life
>button is completely invested in the story at this point, and while she is going through the last few sequenced bits of the campaign, I reach down and start to play with the tail
>she either doesn’t notice or doesn’t care
>I know how important the story is to her so I don’t pull or do anything that would distract her, total dick move
>won’t post spoilers… but Halo 4 ending is actually pretty moving…
>despite tail, I end up getting distracted as well, also apparently you see MC’s face if you finish on legendary so I am hanging out for that
>turned out to be a tiny glimpse, but still cool
>finally… we finished… THE GAME
threefiddy-dinosaur-cab-ride-to-belair.rekt
>button hops up on her knees and faces me with an ever so slightly sad/disappointed look on her face
>her tail hanging off the edge of the couch
>”do you think she will come back?” she asks me
>”of course… next one will be his personal mission to find her, and when he does, she will have managed to get a body or something, also cue impending galactic doom, then in third one some sort of knowledge she has is the only way to save ‘universe destroying event’ of epic proportions”
>button looks at me for a bit thinking about what I said
>“that’s actually pretty good…” she remarks having found no flaws in my logic
>iknowright?
>I take plates back over and begin washing up everything from dinner
>button heads to the bathroom and I assume she is taking the plug out for the night
>it is starting to get late and I’m not going to pretend to know what it is like to have that thing all the time
>legitnohomobro remember?
>about 15 minutes later, as I am finishing up the drying, button exits the bathroom and heads back to the couch
>as she walks past I notice her carrying the bottle of lube
>and the plug is still in her
>looks like I’m about to win the powerbum jackpot!
>when I turn to face her she is back up on her knees at the edge of the couch closest to me
>as I begin walking over to her, she stretches out her arms towards me
>love it when she does this… doesn’t happen often though
>usually only after something has moved her a bit or made her really happy, then she gets a bit handsy
>when I reach her, button wraps her arms around my neck, “there’s something I want to try…”
>BUMSEXTIME!!!
>she starts kissing and me while slowly moving back along the couch
>I lean more and more forward, not wanting to break the flurry of small kisses
>eventually I can’t lean over the edge of the couch any further
>she keeps moving back
>I have to crawl over the couch to keep up with her
>even after I’ve scaled couch-Everest, she keeps moving back away from me
>and I keep following, enjoying her sudden outpour of gentle affection
>it’s a nice change of pace
>plus there is a potential plundering of her fudge factory looming on the horizon
>we continue this little kiss n’ shuffle dance until she is nearly at the end of the couch
>at which point she pushes me backwards straddles atop me, pulling her shirtdress up and over her head as she does so
>I take the cue and pull my own shirt off
>”wanna play with it?” she asks me with a grin
>damn finishing that campaign put button in a good mood, I think to myself while nodding so enthusiastically that I nearly suffer the same fate as Christopher Reeves
>see I was going to do a thing there with button riding me and throw in a horse reference to tie in the Christopher Reeves thing… but I just couldn’t get it to work…
apologeticspaghetti.zip
>button hops up and motions for me to take my pants off
>my pants dissapear in a puff of smoke
>I was perhaps, a little disappointed… but still very surprised when she hopped back on top of me
>facing the opposite direction
>button takes my one-eyed wonder weasel in her hands as she shuffles her ass back towards me
>she really doesn’t afraid of anything huh?
>I put my hand on her hips and keep guiding her back until her slit is within tongue punching reach
>all while holding the tail of the buttplug to the side in order to avoid it causing me to sneeze right into Mr happys flappy garage
<WARNING: EXPLICIT IMAGE – CLICK TO VIEW>
(opens in new tab)
>the moment I finish assisting the backing up of buttons glorious dripping wet yet plugged rear end, I feel a warm and wet sensation on my cock as she takes me into her mouth
>I respond by immediately punching buttons canoe captain with my tongue…
>however my sights are most definitely set on a slightly higher prize
>literally speaking
>I study the plug at the base of the tail that I’m still holding to one side
>it smells like strawberries…
>best invention ever… scented butt lube, should be a Nobel prize nomination
>button withdraws my pork sword from her throat sheathe, “you can play as much as you want until you cum” she announces from the other end of the couch “but then we are even again”
>she always did hate owing anything to anybody…
>I’m also starting to realise she takes her gaming very seriously… like sexually seriously…
challengeaccepted.tiff
>while still absent mindedly running my tongue over her clit, I grab the base of her tail firmly and start to pull it ever so gently outwards
>button slows down with her strokes… distracted as I slowly pull the large base of the plug out of her ass
>”slow…” button instructs me
>at first I worry it might be stuck…
>but eventually she relaxes enough that her tight hole gives way and the plug pops out
>from the tip to the widest point (before the skinny part and the base) would be maybe 5in, and the widest part was on par with the base of my middle two fingers
>bearing in mind I have fairly big hands too…
>I reach over to the coffee table and squirt some lube on my hand before working it over the plug
>first thing I notice is how incredibly warm it is… suppose it was lodged up buttons ass for the last few hours
>button gets back to work on my cock, she has practically perfected her technique by now and its already feeling incredible, despite having blown twice already today
>she is causing me to completely re-evaluate what I considered to be ‘my limits’
>I take my two lubed fingers, slide them into her pussy, curling them down towards me while still flicking her clit gently with my mouth fist
>multitasking is not my strongpoint… but over the years I have managed to get the tongue and fingers doing separate tasks … though I still can’t help unconsciously using the same rhythm for both
Imgoodwithdirectionsthough.png
Note: I debated for quite some time when writing this part. I couldn’t decide if I should refer to buttons asshole with slang terms or not. In the end I decided that pushing my fingers into buttons rusty bullet hole, staring at button’s turd cutter, tickling buttons tight cornhole and of course… pushing the buttplug down button’s good old dirt road; just didn’t lend itself very well to setting the sort of mood I was trying to set.
>button ups her pace a bit… if she keeps this up I am only going to have about 5-6 minutes tops of play time
>making sure the plug is nice and lubed up, I rest it back against buttons ass and start to gently push forward
>there is a huge amount of resistance, but as I keep the pressure up she slowly allows it into her bit by bit
>I watch with fascination as the slimy black rubber slowly disappears inside of her
>as the plug gets increasingly wider down its length, button is forced to stretch more and more to accommodate it
>she takes me out of her mouth, spits on my cock and then starts working my knob and shaft with her hand so she can concentrate on relaxing more
>the tail plug is nearing its base in terms of depth
>button loses her stride, her technique becoming a bit sloppy
>no pun intended…
>”nnnnggghhh…” she growls through gritted teeth, although there is a very playful undertone to it
>”having fun faggot?” she winces as her ass gets close to devouring the widest point of the plug
>”you have no idea… does it hurt?” I ask her out of concern… though she did say I could play
>”as long as you go slow it doesn’t… just kind of… weird” she responds
>”bad weird?” I inquire as I slide the plug slowly back out before it has a chance to slip all the way in
>button puts her mouth back down on my cock and continues to work it for a moment as I begin to work the plug in and out of her
>”good weird… I could get use to it” she declares after a minute or so
>I’m still working it in and out pretty slowly, but she definitely is starting to relax more
>oh man there goes the 70m line…
>I take both the plug out of her ass and my fingers out of her slit
>this was the moment I was working up to
>start to work a bit more effort into button’s clit in order to distract her as I slowly push two of my fingers into her ass
>it’s an incredibly tight fit, but with some twisting and turning I finally manage to get the tips in
>button switches back over to jerking while she deals with the new sensation
>I keep pushing my fingers in, having a gentle feel around her
<WARNING: EXPLICIT IMAGE – CLICK TO VIEW>
(opens in new tab)
TANGENT TIME!!!! *wow such classical greentext! Much originals!*
>late high school
>one of glands in neck gets really swollen
>figured it was prob minor tonsillitis
>because mumbro said if glandular fever; then both glands swell up
>head to local 24/7 clinic
>go in to see doc, wait for 2 hours to get in
>doc I normally see is heaps nice and professional mid age lady
>super respectable personality, genuinely tries to diagnose shit instead of just hand out useless scripts like food stamps
>she on vacation…
>HUGE fucking Russian man comes out and calls my name in thick accent
>hands the size of canoe paddles
>stubble all over his face, pores so big you could putt a golf ball into them
>tell doc about problem
>doc makes me open mouth for standard ‘aahhh’, then feels neck a bit before asking me to get up on table
>wut?
>sit up on table
>doc takes a pair of gloves from a box that reads XXXXXXXL and starts trying to stretch them over his club hands
>”just remove pants down and lay on side my friend” he instructs to me with his gentle but firm Russian accent
>but… muh necks? Is he going to massage my neck?
>last thing I see as before I turn to face wall is him pumping about half a cup of gel out of a giant container of KY
>not special doctors lube
>just straight up KY brand water based rape jelly
>slowly pull pants down… feeling exposed and vulnerable
>”hug knees to stomach like trying to protect from grizzly bear”
>Is this guy a real doctor? Should I call for a nurse or something?
>doctor walks over to me and puts firm hand on my hip
>so strong… wait, what has my asshole got to do with my neck?
>”just relax my friend”
>wouldn’t it be a shorter distance to the inside of my neck through my mouth?
>cold sensation on my hairy unmaintained virgin teenage asshole
>spaghetti is leaking out of nose
>I just came in for a swollen neck… see my neck? See how its swollen? Right here… on my throat?
>my heart pounding, eyes darting around nervously… I want to say something but canoe hand on hip has me mortified
>intense pain as doctor slides what must be his entire fist into my tight smelly raisin
>at least I hope it was his fist?
>I just lay there and let him have his way with me, hoping he will at least be quick
>imposter doctor does some “hmmm’s” and “ahhhhhhhhhh’s” before removing fist from my anus
>opens fist and drops my anal virginity into the bin next to him
>I stare at the wall in front of me, just glad that its finally over
>his big strong hand still on my hip consoling me after our secret workplace affair
>”good news! Is not glandular fever, I give you script for antibiotics and all better in few days”
>”th-th-thank you doc” I sob softly as I pull my pants back up, feeling dirty and ashamed with myself
>”remember to finish all of antibiotics or will not go away fully and have to come back” he says to me while showing me out
>”have good day my friend!”
>I walk slowly out of the doctors private molestation dungeon…
>“I love you…” I whisper back softly before doing trudge of shame home to scrub myself and cry in the shower until the hot water runs out
>took every single one of those antibiotics
>and that how I became fagget
>fin
>never told button this story for obvious reasons
>mfw she proofreads everything before I post
Back to ‘The Pluggening’
>my fingers are about halfway into button’s ass
>shit is so cash… super tight, nothing like her salami bin at all
>smells like strawberries because of lube
>no regrets
>button is still sticking to working my breadstick with just her hand and spit while she gets accustomed to things
>after a few slow back and forths with my fingers, I can feel her noticeably relax
>she is still making some noise, but it’s more grunts of effort
>still pretty sexy
>button switches back to tandem mouth and shaft combo
>apparently at some point over the last few headjobs, she started to work out how to breathe through her nose
>still has to take a breather every so often, but she can power on for a good minute nearly nonstop
>I’m still just working my two fingers slowly in and out of her ass in slow twisting action
>button keeps having to pause the headjob as she begins to noticeably whimper softly while exhaling
>I am still paying close attention to her clit, so I can’t tell if the fingers in ass is feeling good or if it’s the clit
>she redoubles her efforts to make me cum, trying her hardest to concentrate on the technique
>damnit… 80m…
>no matter how much I try not to think about it, I can’t deny that button is doing a splendid job down the other end of the couch
>she has worked up a good amount of spit and she’s now sliding her hand up and down instead of working the skin up and down… feels incredible
>can still feel her softly moaning onto my cock though
>make the decision to stop playing with her clit to gauge how much she is enjoying the ass play
>concentrate on my fingers, moving them a bit faster (albeit it is still a very slow pace) and deeper
>she is definitely still whimpering a bit, and I figure out it’s in rhythm with my fingers as they slide back into her butt
>I push my fingers as deep as I can, all the way up to the knuckle, feels so weird… whole thing is a new experience for both of us
>85m
>I curl my fingers downwards, seeing if I can still rub g-spot or something
>button definitely reacts positively, she pauses mid stroke with her mouth to let out a moan
>suddenly realise that if I can make this feel good enough for her, it will delay her ability to get me there
>I don’t know the limits or anything yet, so I am still fairly gentle and slow, but I begin building up some pressure, trying to massage her g spot with my fingers running in and out of her ass instead of her slit
>nowhere near as effective but she is still starting to seriously struggle to maintain her technique as she works my joystick
>at this point it seems she has just resorted to getting as much spit out as possible and going to town with her hands
>90m
>damn it’s working too…
>feel like I’m playing street fighter or something, throwing attacks back and forth at each other
>start to beat up captain maximus clitoris to distract button
>she is really struggling to hold her form…
>”huuunnnggg… …shhii… nnnngghhhh” she is trying her best to still use some of her mouth
>suddenly disaster strikes
>95m
>buttons struggling attempts to continue blowing me, along with her now increasingly tightening grip on my broom handle are having the unforeseen effect of actually bringing me closer
>fortunately… it sounds like button is just about to climax as well
soitbegins.mov
>the final showdown
>rain plummets down around us, pierced occasionally by thick crackling thunder as button and I both stand on the top of the tall city building
>I begin my relentless onslaught of powerful attacks as I massage her g spot while sliding my fingers in and out of her ass whilst also simultaneously unleashing a flurry of jabs at her clit
>button is nearing defeat… I have her nearing the edge of the building, just a bit further…
>suddenly she draws on a reserve of hidden strength, determined not to lose to the one and only ‘Señor Faggorita’ master of both finger and tongue, professional cave explorer
>button manages to use her powers of neutrality and antibullshittery to find herself a moment of clarity
>she spits on my cock before sliding her hand up and down my shaft with renewed confidence while lowering her mouth around it…
>what’s this? A new technique?
IMPOSSIBRUUUU.chink
>she keeps her mouth slightly open, allowing her to keep whimpering with a mouthful of my meat, simply brute forcing herself into the headjob
>button now has me standing on the edge of the building, rain cascading down around us
>any second now she is about to push me over the edge… this is the end for Señor Faggorita…
>wait… of course…
>some might call it cheating… but right now it’s my last hope… my final salvation…
>the legendary Konami Code!
>99m
>I waste no time, any second now button will take the victory and it will be game over
>I press my tongue against buttons clit and start bashing in the code
>up up
>down down
>left right
>left right
>wait… B and A… which one is B? the ass or the vagina?
>I figure I have a 50/50 chance of getting it right…
>here goes nothing
>I slide my fingers back into buttons ass all the way down to the knuckle, pressing my fingertips down as I move them forward
>lets hope that’s B
>now for A
>I slide my thumb into buttons quite literally ‘dripping into my mouth’ pussy
>the moment my thumb slides in I feel button fall off the edge of the building
>victory is swee-…
>button grabs a hold of me at the last second and pulls me over the edge with her
>she starts tugging at my cock with uncanny speed as she keeps my knob just inside of her mouth as if she was the lead singer in metal band midway through a throat gurgling growl with the microphone halfway down her throat
>we both start cumming at the same time
>button is moaning with my tallywhacker in her between her lips as I start shooting load after load into her, my fingers still buried in her ass, my thumb up her cooter, and my mouth now flicking at her clit
>we stay locked like this for a few seconds as we both do an equal amount of tensing, panting, puffing, quivering, swearing and sighing in sweet sweet release
>most glorious double fatality the world has ever seen
>as we start winding down, button collapses on top of me, giving me a face full off pussy and ass
>still smells like strawberries…
>as I lay there enjoying the view, button still has my (now soggy) breadstick in her hand… she runs her tongue over it a bit
>knowing that both her mouth, my cock and her hand were all covered in my cum would’ve been extremely hot about 3 minutes ago…
>but you know how it is after you bust, just hungry and sleepy
>eventually she hops up, wiping her hand across her face and then looking at me casually and letting out a dramatic sigh
>”let’s try to do this sort of stuff earlier in the day from now on” she says to me blandly
>I give her a confused look
>button starts walking towards the bathroom ”I need a third shower badly… but all I want to do is get into bed”
>doesn’t bother me that much… but then I suppose I don’t have to deal with having to dry all that hair
>I make sure to grab the still slippery tail plug and bring it in to clean
>by the time I get into the bathroom, button is poking her bum under the water, washing away all the lube
>while I’m rinsing the plug under hot water, being careful not to get the fur wet, I ask button if she didn’t mind the whole butt play thing
>button gives me an indifferent sort of look as she rinses her hair under the water (got cum and spit all over the end of it as she was going to town during the 69)
>”…maybe” she says finally with the faintest hint of a smile
>I step up into the shower and move to button, who begins rubbing soap over me now that she is finished with herself, making sure to get all the spit and cum off willy
>poor guy… he looks, feels and smells like a Japanese whore that just finished shooting a 6 hour long bukkake video
>but there is no denying the facts now, button could probably take me in her ass already with some effort, a few more days of play and it would be more than do-able… and enjoyable even, given her reactions before
>for the first time ever I have a serious shot at this… I’ve been wanting to try it forever, but most girls just squeeze there ass shut and nope the fuck out at the mention of it
>but not button she’s open enough to give anything a go at least once before forming an opinion…
>button picks up the loofah and starts to move it over shoulders and arms
>”it’s gonna happen…” I tell her with a confident smile
>”careful faggot…” she cautions at me still staring forward, but adopting a ‘don’t push me’ smile as she scrubs my chest with the loofer
>”I know you’re curious as well… you enjoyed that earlier” I continue to gloat at her, riding a high; born out of the sudden revelation of the inevitable willy-in-bum, along with the glorious events of the past 30 minutes
>button, while still looking at my chest, raises her gaze and peers up at me with the same smile
>It’s an intimidating look… one that, in hindsight, I wish I had taken more seriously
>but right now I feel like Charlie after he just found the golden ticket and now gets a tour of the fudge factory with willy himself
>I put the final nail in my coffin, “I’m going to fuck your ass, you’re going to enjoy it… and you know it” I say to her
>button lifts her head to meet my gaze properly and studies my face
>after looking at me for a bit, she begins to speak with a calm and cool tone “from this moment on, you can’t touch my butt, you can’t ask for my butt… you can’t even hint towards it let alone talk about it…”
>”…” I begin to open my mouth in protest but she just keeps going…
>“…from this point on my ass is 100% off limits unless I tell you otherwise” she declares
>telling me it’s off limits just makes me want to take it off her by force
>she has her hands resting on my chest, looking up at me with same the same cool, calm eyes and smile
>I bring my head down towards hers, ”what’s to stop me from taking it by force…” I whisper at her while running my hands down her back and towards her ass in a show of defiance
>she doesn’t move, just watches me nonchalantly as I move in to kiss her
>”because…” she begins to whisper back at me, her lips lightly brushing mine as the words come out, “that was my second wish… faggot”
>button puts her hands either side of my face as she meets my lips and gives me a single, slow, drawn out but genuinely affectionate kiss… she stares right into my eyes through the entire thing before pulling away with a smile
>my golden backdoor ticket to button’s wonka factory turns to dust in my hands
>button hops down out of the shower and starts to dry herself
>to say that I was feeling regretful would be an understatement…
>I want to try and back pedal and give her some sort of humbled apology that will make her take back what she just did
>but I know button too well for that… she loves situations like this, loves the power… loves watching me struggle…
>why couldn’t she have used her second wish like the first one… wished for me to be balls deep in her chocolate starfish or something
>after exploring all possibilities and finally coming to terms with my glorious mistake, I turn off the shower and step out
>button stands there wrapped in her towel and looks at me, looking exhausted
>”something wrong anon” she asks me mockingly, looks like she wants to twist the knife a little before she falls asleep
>I figure the more I struggle the more she will want to draw this charade out… best thing to do is to just admit defeat, let button have some fun and pray to Allah that she decides to lift the bum ban soon
>”sorry” I mumble at her, trying to sound as sincere as possible to show her how much I regret pushing things
>”I know” she says it gently and consolingly
>button stretches her arms out towards me, “can you dry my hair for me? please…”
>as she puts her arms around my neck I lift her up and place her on bathroom vanity
>she simply rests her head on my shoulder as I plug the hairdryer in and attempt to mimic what I have seen girls do in the past
>first time I have ever tried to do this… figured you just point and blow and shit goes dry… apparently there is at least a little bit of a technique to it
>”start at the roots and blow towards the tips, as if you are pushing the water down” button mumbles at me from my shoulder after realising I genuinely had no fucking clue what I was doing
>after her hair feels reasonably dry, I lift her up and carry her over to the bed
>It’s too difficult to go pulling sheets back and shit… I’m not superman, so I just let button slide down off me
>she lets the towel drop to the ground before getting under the blankets
>I’m tired but not overly sleepy so I decide to get a few things done while button sleeps
>despite how it seems, I’m not moping
>sure I’m butthurt, but moping would only make things worse and get me called a faggot
>besides… it’s not like we are dating or anything, so there is no reason to have to go to bed at the same time
>and even if we were… that’s the sort of cliché bullshit that button hates
>I take the towel back to hang-up and dry, turn off the lights and then jump on the computer for a bit to knock over a few things I need to get done, just check and send some emails, look if I can enrol for semester 1 classes yet
>if you don’t get in early then you end up with all the shitty classes at awkward times
>after about an hour messing around I head off to bed
>the moment I climb in and settle, button shimmies across the bed and into me, facing the opposite direction
>I can feel her wiggle her butt into my crotch affectionately, hinting at me to spoon her
>as I put an arm around her and pull her in tight, she mumbles her version of ‘goodnight’ to me, “no funny butt business while I’m asleep faggot”
>goddamnit I was so close today as well…
The Story Of Button 
>after all she did willingly let/make me he (her) first for… well practically everything?
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What does this even mean? I can’t even your comment… seriously?
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UH, ITS OLIVANDERS WAND SHOP YOU UNEDUCATED FUCK
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YES THAT WAS GENERALLY WHAT I WAS FUCKING GOING FOR YOU CUCKWAFFLE…
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